Monday 2 August 2010

Something of a let down

It's a bold decision of Waqar Younis to pick Mohammad Yousuf. He is stranded at the British Embassy in Islamabad, stuck in a tense diplomatic tete-a-tete, between the British ambassador and Imran Khan. After hours of negotiation, a deal is finally done: Pakistan's premier batsman is given a visa, in return for Mushtaq Ahmed agreeing to be the England spin coach for the next 25 years. Graciously, Andrew Strauss agrees that irrespective of the outcome of the toss, England will agree to bat first and Pakistan can field a substitute fielder whilst Yousuf arrives.

Back at Edgaston, Salman Butt's announces the changes to his team: Azhar Ali is replaced by Mohammad Yousuf, Danish Kaneria is replaced by little Raza Hasan, and in a surprise move, Mohammad Asif makes way for Waqar, who plays as a player-coach. As Salman explains, Waqar can still match the 75 mph achieved by Asif at Trent Bridge, and he's a better bowler.

On a pitch offering generously swing, Waqar is able to trap Alistair Cook, leg before wicket in the second over. And could this be trouble for England, as Jonathan Trott snicks Mohammad Amir to waiting gloveman Kamran Akmal? Well, it's Kevin Pietersen time, and he responds well to the challenge. Belying the silly suggestions that he might be dropped, he clubs the Pakistani seamers around the Birmingham ground, reaching his half-century before England lunch at 111-2.

Shortly after lunch, little Raza Hasan receives a boost as he is offered his first bowl in Test Cricket. His first over is, however, not a happy affair: Strauss hits three boundaries, including a towering six over mid-wicket, to take 14 off the over. And oh no - what is this? Pietersen is facing Raza's next over, and the Sky lipreadometer is able to decipher him saying to Strauss "I'm going to hit the little guy's first ball into Lincolnshire."

Nervously, Raza limbers up. One step, then two. He reaches the crease and tosses the ball up, as if making a sacrificial offering to batting lord Pietersen. The Anglo-African steps forth to give the ball the clout of its life. One step, then two. Ball meets batsman. Batsman meets ball. Pietersen takes a huge swipe...but he misses and 'stumper Akmal has him out, stumped, defeated by his own conceit.

By close, England have reached 346 for 4 (Strauss 146, Collingwood 85*).

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"Final call for passenger Yousuf, travelling on Flight 385 to London."
Mohammad Yousuf escapes the clutches of the journalists, and scurries to the Departure Gate. He is on course to reach Edgbaston by lunchtime on the second day. He boards the plane and finds his seat. He waits. He waits. He waits. The pilot speaks on the intercom, explaining that due to an unexpected engine fault, the plane will not be able to take off.
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The second day is a disheartening day for the tourists. By lunchtime, the fluency of Paul Collingwood and Eoin Morgan has ruled out any possibility of a Pakistan victory. The only question is whether the Pakistanis can save the game. England eventually declare after Morgan has shimied his way to his maiden double century. 656 is a lot of runs. Waqar may have taken 5 wickets, but after 31 overs, he's pretty tired.
The Pakistan innings gets off to a miserable start, and in a bitter replica of their performance on the previous Saturday evening, they find they have lost three wickets in only eight overs. James Anderson makes Salman look slightly foolish, but reasoning that Mohammad Yousuf will arrive overnight and will be able to bat twice, the Pakistani skipper knows there is still hope.
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Exhausted but relieved, Mohammad Yousuf knows he is finally on his way as his plane leaves from the Islamabad runway. However, the flight encounters unexpected wind, and is forced to divert to Cairo to refuel. When a sirocco grounds all flights out of Egypt, he has to telephone Waqar to say he won't make Edgbaston until the fourth day.
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The commentators ponder which Pakistan will turn up on Sunday morning: the group of richly talented players of unrivalled flair, or the slightly pathetic lot who didn't seem to try at Trent Bridge? The answer is soon clear, as the Akmal brothers tear into the England bowlers. Pakistan are 156 for 3 at lunch. Are they finally going to make a match of it?
Unfortunately, there is a calamitous loss of wickets between lunch and tea. In all, Pakistan manage to lose 12 wickets in one session, to a combination of committed swing bowling and batsmen not trying. They manage a bit better in the evening session. But only a bit. After another cluster of wickets, they are eight down, with only little Raza Hasan and the absent Mohammad Yousuf remaining. Little Raza holds out for six overs, but then pads up to a straight one from Graeme Swann. England appeal. The finger goes up. Have England won?
There is some confusion, because it is at exactly that point Edgbaston is hit by a thunderstorm and play is immediately suspended. The umpires claim that as Yousuf was not present when the wicket fell, Pakistan had completed their innings and were all out.
However, as the rain falls Pakistan sense a way out of the match. Imran Khan 'phones up from Pakistan, pleading with the umpires just to allow them until the fourth day to see if Mohammad Yousuf can somehow salvage the game.
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The sirocco has subsided, and Mohammad Yousuf is on his way. However, Birmingham air-traffic controllers are on strike, and unbelievably, his plane is diverted to Norwich Airport. There he has to wait four hours for a customs official to arrive from London.
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Unfortunately, the fourth day of the match is lost to rain.
The final day is a conundrum: will the rain relent and allow England to press for the elusive final wicket? Will Mohammad Yousuf's train get to Birmingham New Street in time?
The rain finally gives way to the sunshine at 4:00 pm, and to the doubt of the Pakistani coaching team, the umpires allow play to start at 5:30. That start time gets put back to 5:45, whilst groundsman Steve Rouse tries to find some petrol to start the roller. That suits the Pakistani team very well, because it is at 5:40 that Mohammad Yousuf walks through the dressing room door.
England have two overs to dismiss either Waqar or Mohammad Yousuf. Waqar faces Anderson, with a spring in his step. Waqar pushes forward, and chips the ball behind square. Morgan is forced to dive to his right, but he is able to clutch the ball to save it reaching the boundary. Eager to remain positive, Mohammad Yousuf calls Waqar for a single. Waqar says no, but against the painful background noise of a Pakistani vuvezela which was smuggled into the ground, Mohammad Yousuf does not hear him. Morgan flips the ball back to Anderson, who whips the bails off. Mohammand Yousuf is run out without facing a ball.

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