Monday 16th August
Been ringing round the counties following Andy Flower's announcement that I have to be join a county. He didn't specifically say that Minor Counties was out of the question, but I'd better play it safe. Middlesex seem to be interested, but to be honest, I'd rather go to Northamptonshire. It seems to be the hotbed for young cricketing talent, although they don't have quite as many South Africans as they used to, which could be a disadvantage.
Tuesday 17th August
Build up to the Oval Test Match. I have to stay at the team hotel at Kennington, which seems a bit silly when I live in Chelsea, but Andy says I have to go there to build up the team spirit.
Training at the ground was BRILLIANT. We did nets as usual, and I wasn't batting at all well, but then Andy had a brain wave. He set up Merlyn to bowl as Ashley Giles, so I could practice range hitting. It did me the world of good and now I am hitting it cleanly again. Can't wait to get going in the Test.
Wednesday 18th August - The Third Test Match, Day One
I'm in big trouble with Andy and Andy. I woke up and forgot the match was starting today - and, in fairness, who has ever heard of a test match starting on Wednesday? - and I just thought that today was another build up day. So I only arrived at the ground at 10:50. Luckily, Andy realised I was stupid, had worked out what was going on, and left me on the team sheet.
Anyway, it was a good day for England. Aren't they all nowadays? Andy won the toss, decided we would bat on a lovely strip against lovely bowling. Unfortunately, Cookie was out for a duck - bit of a worry, his form - and Trotty didn't fare much better. When I got to the crease at 11:32 it wasn't looking great. I wasn't feeling great, either, especially after my run-in with Andy, but then I thought back to my time against Merlyn yesterday. I felt much better, and started hitting Mohamed Asif about a bit. Talking about Asif - what is going on with that guy's hair? Anyway, it came off, and by the time I was out for 158 after tea, trying to see if I could hit the ball into the face of Big Ben, England were looking pretty good at 345 for 4. By close Colly had got to his century, and England closed on 389 for 5.
Thursday 19th August - The Third Test Match, Day Two
It was my turn to drive Graeme Swann to the ground today, and I think my good form may have rubbed off on him. He certainly bowled well after Andy declared on 602-9. Firstly, he got Farhat out padding up. Then, our "fish's bottom" sledge to Salman Butt finally paid off - he charged down the wicket, cried "Geronimo", took a wild swing and got himself stumped. I'd call him an idiot, but let's face it, who am I to talk? Anyway, the rest of the Pakistani batting line up rolled over like a pack of cards. What is it that the French say: plus ca change? Unfortunately, I'm not clever enough to put the cedilla under the "c" in "ca", but you get the idea.
Mohamed Yousuf batted pretty well in the evening session. I feel it may well have been the beads he wove into that magnificent beard of his. If only Andy would let me grow my beard back.
Friday 20th August - The Third Test Match, Day Three
Another good day. I LOVE playing for England!
Andy made them follow on after we eventually bowled them out for 324 - with that man Yousuf scoring a hundred. Second time round, they looked a bit demoralised and had subsided to 104-5. Credit is mainly due to Stuart Broad. When he gets his run-up right, his bowling is a joy to behold: his action has expert timing, he bowls as fast as lightning and, fielding behind the stumps, it can be a little bit frightening.
There was one embarrassing moment just after lunch - wee Jimmy was bowling like the wind, and Shoaib Malik played at the ball. Behind the stumps, I could swear we all heard a click as the ball passed the bat, and sure enough my drinking buddy Simon Taufel stuck his finger up. But Malik reviewed it, and remarkably, Hot Spot showed that the noise we all heard was Alistair Cook breaking wind at silly point.
Saturday 21st August - The Third Test Match, Day Four
We JUST got this wrapped up in time for my big night out on Saturday with Swanny and the boys. Kamran Akmal, playing as a specialist batsman, scored a big hundred and forced us to bat again. We needed to score 89 off 12 overs before close of play. Luckily, Cookie was as keen as I was for a night at "El Splendidos" in Chelsea, and hit out at the Pakistani bowlers. I think it was just what he needed, and he scored an undefeated 54. He looked dead pleased when he was walking back to the pavilion. Anyway, it was a GREAT win for the boys, and I was pleased to win the Man of the Match.
On another note, I had the strangest dream last night. It was the year 2030, and as Chairman of Selectors I was picking the squad for the Ashes Test Match at Lords. We offered a debut to a young left arm spinner who had been doing well at Northamptonshire. The only thing I can remember about him is that his initials were HJBS, and Jessica said he was good looking. I wish for the life of me that I could remember the kid's name.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment